mother creative

What next?

I’m constantly asking myself this. The world is in a holding pattern. At times I do lament how things were. But then I’m quickly reminded of all that is still intact AND sacred in my life. And I’m then reminded that change is fine. It’s good even. It’s ok.

The kids haven’t been in school since mid March. They love it. They love being home and having access to me 24/7. And I love having them close. I’ve had to continually adjust my expectations of how our days can look and operate. Sometimes it feels good like I’m growing into a better parent. Other times I feel so burnt out that I’m not sure how much more I can do. I’ll spare you the details of why I feel this way. But I’ll just leave one word here; tantrums.

It’s been 3 months and our way of life has only shifted a little but it’s brought our family much closer.

As for my fiber work though, it’s just taken a back burner that I’ve been resigned to it for a while. My Etsy stock is dwindling and I start to panic just a little on realizing I can’t actually make a plan to replenish it. So instead I do things like clean my studio and set the stage for one tiny task at a time. Work towards a little goal and not let a date enter my mind.

I wish I had more to offer in the shop at this time. I’m still trying to figure out how to be creative with littles at my feet who also want to join in the work. Or who want to be pushed on the swing instead.

Also, I’m growing a ton of random flowers, dye plants, veggies from seed that I’ve had for years with little and lots of hope. They also take up some space in the fiber studio, aka other half of my bedroom. To water them each day and to slowly pick away at assembling more fabric face masks, gives me a bit of strength.

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